Posts Tagged ‘life after death’

Where Is My Son, A Mother Asks?

Saturday, August 8th, 2009

Dealing with Grief: June (name changed), from Birmingham, UK, writes: my son passed away in an accident recently. I’m not sure if it was deliberately caused by someone, or an accident. I need to know where he is. I read a story of yours about 12 months ago that talked about the scene of a car accident, and you said, whilst you understood why people put flowers at the site, that’s not where they are. I need to know what you mean. Thanks June. Phil G shares his answers on spirit contact.

I have changed this lady’s name at her request. However she has given me permission to share my answer with others so that might help them also. I can’t recall the exact article or reply that you are referring to but I do talk about this in my book “Soul Matters – You Can Talk With The Ones You Miss”. I totally understand your grief and despair.

Was it an accident or was it on purpose? I am not in “reading mode”, but as I look over your words “an accident” it feels wrong. My next feeling is that it was an event that didn’t turn out the way they (the ones who caused it) wanted, and it went considerably worse than what they expected. I say this because I am being shown surprise and despair at what they can see is about to happen. So, whilst I feel it was on purpose, I don’t feel there is a laying of blame against these people for the final result (your son’s death).

If I can just elaborate on this point for a moment because I do receive many enquiries from people who want to know about tragic circumstances. Whether there is blame either officially laid or unofficially laid at a person or group of people, the message that comes through time and time again to me is this: Whilst they may be angry or upset or showing me the blame, there is also a feeling that there is no point doing anything about this.

One gentleman in the New York particularly felt the need to retaliate, for the death of his son, who was coming home to celebrate his birthday when tragedy struck. The boy understands the tragic situation that occurred to him and the trauma it has caused his family, but he was at pains to explain to his father to “let it go”. They don’t want us to do dwell on what has happened or on retaliation. That statement isn’t for them, it’s for US. They understand the immense stress and heartache that causes us and holding onto it over a period of time will do nothing more than make you ill. At worst, you may end up doing something you regret. Always in this type of situation that feeling comes through, and it’s coming through now in your particular case, June: that it doesn’t matter and you need to let it go. For your sake. And yes, I understand you know who caused it all, or who would most likely have caused it. You are right. But you need to let it go for your own health, which I feel is deteriorating.

I say that the scene of an accident (where sometimes people put a cross or flowers), is not where the spirit, or soul is now. I often have that feeling when someone is about to pass away. They leave and quite often before everyone else realises (including the medical people) that they have died. I was surprised by a TV series that I saw recently in Australia, where they showed a girl dying in a hospital bed. It’s unusual for a TV show to get it right. I suspect that whoever wrote this scene deeply understands what really happens. They wrote the scene that the person was leaving the soul and walking off to the white light, prior to everyone else realising she had died. I don’t necessarily feel they go into the white light, at least straight away, but I do believe the soul often leaves their bodies before they have passed away.

The TV show had the girl’s soul leaving her body about two minutes before the alarm sounded. The doctors race in trying to revive her unsuccessfully. Whilst some would be distressed by that show and what I just shared, I wanted to share it here because I believe that is what really happens.

Why do they leave their body before the very end? I believe maybe somewhere in the deep distant future science will catch up to this and prove it right. With all our knowledge and understanding of the human body there is so much that we don’t understand particularly of the mind, of souls, and I personally believe our understanding of what happens at the final moments of death is grossly misunderstood by doctors and science. They are looking at what appears to be correct, but I don’t believe it is. What is in the reason we’re spared from the final moments of death, such as in an accident? They don’t want them to go through that final moment of pain and suffering, and they take them away from the situation. I believe that happened in most cases in the Twin Towers tragedy.

So where is their soul? The problem I have with people who think they have to keep going back to the site of an accident is that I firmly believe that’s not where they are. That may be where they were, physically, when the accident occurred. At the moment it happen their soul has left, protected, shielded. In many many cases, they will have already travelled over to where we are, where the most important person or persons in their life are, and visited them briefly. Many have shared their experiences with me of exactly this point. It may have happened to you. It’s happened to me. My mother was in hospital and she had been there for several weeks and was recuperating. We saw her earlier in the day. We were told by the doctors she was coming good. I’m in bed at night, and the phone rings. I knew the moment the phone rang she had passed away. Why would I think that? I had received many phone calls prior to this to say she is not well come over straight away. On none of those occasions did I feel she had died. I know of many who have a similar experience to share.

So, if they can be with someone miles away at the time they’ve passed away or just after that it suggests to me that they’re not still at the site. When I have done readings in a situation where there has been an accident like this, I often get a little image of people standing around in horror looking at what’s happened and I can feel or see the souls leaving the body, stepping back, and looking on with wonder. In the film “Ghost” where Patrick Swayze is standing, looking, not sure, not understanding that he has just died.

So the next question is, as Jean writes, where is her son? I differ in my opinion from many others on this topic. Everyone is entitled to their own belief. But I am very confident that what I am about to say is right. They don’t go away. After a while, they don’t need to be with you because you’re getting on with your life and coping and they go off and do what they need to do. But they can come back any time you need them to. In the case of someone who has only recently passed away, I promise they are with you. They are beside you. They are watching you make the dinner, look at their things, their photo, holding things that used to belong to them.

They’re not trying to bother you or get in the way. I am sure they’re not interested in the things you do right or wrong, or wanting to watch you have a shower! That doesn’t come into it. They are around when you grieve and cry and mourn the loss of a loved one. They can see that, and you can feel it if you let them in. They share your tears. They can be with you when you sit or stand, putting their arm around your shoulder and comforting you.

Have a look at my site on the spirit contact (afterlifephilg.com). You don’t need to just take my word for it. You can prove this yourself. In particular, think about my book or CD or have a look at the YouTube video there. When you grieve, June and you wonder where your son is, think of him. Talk to him. Thank him for being with you. Just be aware of what you feel. Not always, but nearly always, you will feel them near you. It might be a feeling like someone touched you, or spoke to you, or a shiver up your spine. Don’t dismiss it as being silly or being imagined. Embrace the feeling that your son is wish you. If you want to cry, do so, but cry because you’re pleased he’s with you. Not that he is gone.

You can make a place for him, such as a memorial, a nice gravesite, or a cross on the side of the road. A special place in your house, where it reminds you of him, honours him, makes you feel he is near. Do these things for you. Not for your son. If you made a particular spot where you feel comfortable that your son can visit you, then he will be there when you want him to be. But you don’t have to keep going back to a particular spot to be with him. Your son is safe in the afterlife. The Afterlife is the energy that is all around you. And any time you need him to be, he will be with you, beside you, sharing as much as possible with you. Embrace the feeling. Follow the advice on my web site on spirit contact (afterlifephilg.com), and learn how to verify that he really is with you.

So for all those mourning the loss or tragic passing of someone special, someone dear, trust they are wherever you need them to be, whenever you need them, and feel their presence, love and tears and joy at connecting with you. Take care. Phil G

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Do We Have Emotional Needs When We Cross Over?

Thursday, August 6th, 2009

From Cincinnati, a reader asks this question on spirit contact: “Is it possible that those who have died have any emotional needs, like belonging or comfort or just to know someone loves them? Do they hold anger? Here, ‘Afterlife Phil ‘ shares his insight and answer. More on spirit contact at afterlifephilg.com [I:http://quickinsider.com/self-improvement/files/2009/08/AfterlifePhilG0.jpg]

Thanks for your questions about how we feel after crossing over. I think they want to be with us, help us, and guide us. I say this because I’ve just replied to someone who was almost involved with someone, but never quite got there, and now feels closer to this person than her actual husband, and she’s quite frustrated by it all. But I don’t think they want to be in a relationship like we picture it. I think it’s more a case of simply wanting to be with us, or help us.

My advice to her was to find a purpose in life, and perhaps let him help her find it. I know several who have done this, and found much joy and purpose in life, still connected with their special person who has crossed over, but with a purpose for their own lives.

They absolutely have emotion, but I’m not sure it’s emotional needs. It’s like the end line in the film “Ghost” where Patrick says “The love inside, you take it with you” I feel is so true. I know in readings, it’s quite common where there’s a strong emotional bond (e.g. partners, or parents) for me to feel totally overwhelmed by their grief (on the other side) and it’s not uncommon for me to be in tears not able to adequately share the words, but totally share the feeling, with those sitting in front of me. So whilst I don’t feel they “blame” us, they most certainly hold the emotion of love, caring and so on.

I don’t generally feel they NEED our acceptance or love, but certainly there are times when they do. And I know they do try to help us. My own father-in-law desperately wanted my wife to forgive him for not treating her better (he wasn’t bad to her, just didn’t accept her and support her as he should have). In suicide cases, I know there is a desperate longing from those who have crossed over, to be forgiven by those they leave behind – like they didn’t realise the devastation they would leave behind.

To answer your question on emotional needs, I’ll hand over to my guys on ‘the other side’ who are helping as I write this: “We’re comfortable within ourselves (on the other side), but especially for those who have recently crossed, it’s like they have so much homework to complete and they need to tick things off the list before they can become calm. Like going to sleep. If there’s a whole lot on your mind, you can’t rest properly until you’ve done those things, then you can relax and go to sleep.

If we have a lot to do, a lot to say, it’s like when you want to tell a friend lots of things, and they want to hear about something else, but you can’t talk about that yet because you HAVE to deal with these other things first”. I hope those words give you some insight.

I’ll leave out some of my answer that was intended solely for my reader, but she asks about anger. Where there is anger from those who have crossed over, it generally subsides after a while. I rarely find they hold the anger.

Do they have needs we can meet? Acceptance. I think they can TRY to influence us, help us, guide us, but they can’t MAKE us do anything, and I think they derive enormous satisfaction that we first of all listen, and secondly accept they’re there. The ‘asking for proof’ that I suggest (on my website afterlifephilg.com) only works for a while, because after a while, you KNOW the difference between your own thoughts and theirs, and it gets tiresome to them to keep proving things – and that shows them you don’t accept what they share. I know that annoys them after a while! So I think our greatest gift to them, that they want, long for, perhaps not need, but strongly desire, is an acceptance of them, their actions in the physical world whether they were good or bad, their presence in our lives now, and their willingness to help us where needed.

I think the negativity that you talk about will gradually float away. Like when you meditate, as you relax, no matter how much ‘negative’ feeling you have, if you relax long enough, you just give up on that feeling and let it go, so in that sense, I think they probably have those feelings to start with, but let them go.

I hope this helps you, and my readers, have a greater understanding of how to accept and deal with family and friends we either grieve for, or feel their presence and want to help them move on. For more information visit my website on spirit contact (afterlifephilg.com) and especially have a look at the CD “Contacting The Afterlife”.

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Dealing With Grief: Deeply Missing Her Mother

Saturday, August 1st, 2009

Dealing with grief: A lady recently wrote to “Afterlife Phil G’s” expressing sharing she was grieving the loss of a loved one. She doesn’t want to be named, but she deeply and profoundly grieves for the loss of her mother. Caring for her until the end, but unable to be there for the final moments, she is distraught, and wants to know how to deal with her grief and move on, when she feels so deeply that she will never be able to. Phil answers with comforting advice about spirit contact from the Afterlife.

Thank you for your enquiry. I understand this is a sad time, and different people deal with grief in different ways. In my own case, when I lost my mother, although I was naturally upset, I felt it was all right, that she was all right. And somehow she was around. I can’t describe it as being any more than that. At that stage, I didn’t really have any signs of proof and I was not what people would call psychic then, but I just felt she was all right and around.

For many, the loss of a loved one is devastating. They feel their loved ones are out of their life permanently, and they are very sad. I receive many enquiries from people who are deeply distressed at the passing of a loved one. One of my very early clients when I first started doing readings, back in 2005, was a lady who deeply missed her husband. When I was sitting with her, I had the overwhelming feeling, deep down, she KNEW he was around but was afraid to admit it or accept it – she much be crazy to think such a thing. Because she was overwhelmed with grief, she couldn’t deal with and couldn’t believe that he might be around. I think this is a common occurrence with those who are so deeply distressed, that they miss the signs. Perhaps not even signs, but rather their own inner feelings that the person they miss is around.[I:http://quickinsider.com/self-improvement/files/2009/08/AfterlifePhilG0.jpg]

There’s a story about a man being rescued in a flood which helps to illustrate the point here: He was stuck in a flood and he was standing on the roof of his house. A man in a boat came past and offered him a ride to safety. He said: “No, thank you, I am waiting for God to rescue me”. Not long afterwards as the waters rose higher and higher, another boat comes past and again he is offered a ride to safety. And again he declined the offer, saying that God will rescue him. Eventually, with the water at the top of the roof of the house where he’s standing, and with his feet in the water, a helicopter comes past. They lower the rope ladder down; a rescuer climbs down and offers a ride to safety. Again he declines, saying he knows God will rescue him. The water comes up higher; the man’s washed away and drowns. He goes to the pearly gates, and when he’s there he is very upset. He demands to know why, when his faith was so firm and so solid, why wouldn’t God rescue him? The reply? “We tried to rescue you three times but you would let us!”

Although that’s just a joke, I strongly believe this is what happens with spirit contact from loved ones who have crossed over. I believe they are trying to come through to anybody who is either missing a loved one who has crossed over, or needs to be warned or guided about something. And that’s irrespective of whether you believed in an afterlife, and spirit contact or not. In the same way as electricity doesn’t care whether you believe in it or not. It will still kill you if you touch it. You’re belief or otherwise, in electricity running through a power point is irrelevant. And so too with spirit contact from the afterlife.

Anyone who writes to me about dealing with grief, receives this advice: The ones you miss are still with you, and you’re getting signs from the ones you miss, now. Now I do understand that contacting someone in the afterlife is not nearly as good as having them here in the physical world, beside you, when you want them to be. However, I have found that understanding that they are still around, and that they are contactable by you, and you can verify that you’re not imagining it, is of enormous relief to so many people I help. I know it’s not the same as them being here with us physically. Nevertheless, I know from all the thank you letters and e-mail’s, that my ideas have helped many. I want to help you.

Sometimes when I reply, I get a specific comment to say to that person to help verify that I’m not just making this up. It’s not like a “reading”; it’s just a little statement that comes out of the blue. And more often than not, I get a reply email saying that was wonderful, because it confirmed I wasn’t just making things up. But that’s not how I want to help you now. I want you to know they’re around, and confirm it yourself. I share much information on spirit contact at afterlifephilg.com

I’m going to give you your first lesson in knowing loved ones who have crossed over are still with you. If you are deeply grieving the loss of a loved one, such as the lady who wrote to me recently, who misses her mother so terribly, my advice is this: Put aside your grief for a moment. Grab something that reminds you of him. In my video “CoffeeTime” (there is a link from my website to the video), and also in my Book “Soul Matters – you can talk with the ones you Miss”, I talk about setting up a reference point. It can be something that reminds you of them. It could be a coffee cup. It could be a photograph. It could be a piece of clothing. It doesn’t matter what it is, it just needs to be something that helps you feel them near you. On my CD “Contacting The Afterlife – A Spoken Beginner’s Guide” I t you step-by-step through this process, and that makes it very easy, particularly for people who don’t feel they can do this themselves, to make their own connection and verify it. When you’re holding or looking at this object, think about them, talk to them, as if they’re here right now.

The film “PS I love you”, which came out a few years ago and is on DVD shares a wonderful example: The girl who has lost her husband in the film talks to him as if he’s really there. It doesn’t feel old or strange to her. She doesn’t really worry about whether it’s real or not. She just does it. That’s what I want you to do. Talk to them about things in your life, things that are happening, things that happened in the past, good times, fond memories, some funny things that you did together. And just enjoy the experience as if they’re there. You will probably feel overwhelmed. Not with grief, but with a feeling that they really are with you.

But don’t stop here. I want you to approach the whole exercise as if it’s real. Whether you believe this or not. When you’ve finished talking to them, thank them for the experience and for the time spent with you. I’m not worried at this stage whether you believe this is possible or not, I just want you to do it.

You will find each time you do it the experience becomes easier and the contact more recognizable. In my book, and particularly on my CD, I share specifics about the questions I want you to ask, to verify your experiences are real. But you will find after awhile, you won’t even need to verify. That’s because you’ll know the difference between thoughts that are in your head and feelings that seem to hop out of nowhere into your mind. There is a difference. And to start with, you may not recognize it. But if you keep doing this you will.

If you follow my advice, have a look at my website on spirit contact (afterlifephilg.com), my YouTube video, or think about obtaining my book or CD: you’ll begin to understand that you don’t need to grieve for them as much as you do. Miss them? Certainly. But it eases the pain and is enormously comforting to know the ones we miss, when they die, it’s not the end. So to the lady who deeply misses her mother, and for anyone who is reading this article, who has had a son, daughter, parent, brother, sister, or friend pass away: You can understand that they are still wish you and I hope I can help you to understand that you can connect with their spirit and confirm it. Take Care, Phil G.

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Spirit Contact: You Have To Believe It’s Possible, First.

Thursday, July 30th, 2009

I want you, an ordinary person, who grieves the loss of a loved one, to understand how simple it is to connect with the Afterlife. But you will find it hard if you don’t believe it’s possible. And TV shows such as “The Ghost Whisperer” don’t help you either!

The reason I start off with a track called “Accepting The Possibility” on my CD “Contacting The Afterlife – A Spoken Beginner’s Guide”, is that if you are closed to the concept of being able to contact spirits or experience spirit contact, you will find it much harder to do, and make it much harder for those who are trying to come through to you to do so. [I:http://quickinsider.com/self-improvement/files/2009/07/AfterlifePhilG0.jpg]

Now, while I believe anybody can do this, I do understand there are different levels of talent. Some will be very good. Some are not so good. But I do believe everybody can do what I do. And that is: gradually come to a situation where you can recognize the signs of contact and then verify it’s real. But I do honestly believe you need to accept the possibility before it happens.

During a reading for a large family gathering a while ago and I brought through information for most people in the room. However, there was a man in the corner of the room, showing interest, but having no desire to participate. During a reading, I ask my guys on the other side for guidance, and I got a strong “don’t bother with the man in the corner” feeling. At the end of the session, I always ask if there are any general questions.

I brought through information for most people in the room during a session for a large family gathering a while ago. However, there was a man in the corner of the room, showing interest, but having no desire to participate. During a session, I ask my guys on the other side for guidance, and I got a strong “don’t bother with the man in the corner” feeling. At the end of the session, I always ask if there are any general questions.

“What happens if you completely do not believe spirit contact is possible?” I was asked. I explained nicely that it’s the right of every individual to believe things or not believe things. But I felt very much as if she was referring to the gentleman in the corner of the room. Not wanting to offend him, I explained my thoughts on everybody being entitled to their belief. But I went on to explain that I think it is a pity where a particular family member will go beyond this, and ridicule the rest of the family for the believing in contact with the spirit world. This is no different to whether somebody does or doesn’t like football. Some people love it, some people hate it. But I think it is a shame when one person expects everyone else to share the same view.

Everyone needs the freedom to reach their own conclusion. Fortunately, the man in question, although he did not believe contact with the afterlife, he did leave the rest of the family open to their own thoughts and opinions. That’s wonderful.

The problem with forcing your beliefs on others in the family, if you don’t believe this is possible, is that you cut off your nose to spite your face. When that person crosses over to the other side and they suddenly realise that this is possible, they’ve already convinced their family it’s not possible, and they can’t come through.

I sometimes have people from the other side come through who are completely surprised that they’re still around! They can see and hear what’s going on, and they are aware their family is here, but they can’t come through, because the family won’t believe it. Now fortunately, in some of those cases I am then able to help them understand that it is possible and get them past that point. But generally it’s quite difficult. And that’s why I believe it’s important to let people come to their own opinion

In your own instance, if you don’t believe contact with the spirit world is possible, it makes it much harder for them to come through. You need too much proof. I find this when I do readings that those who are open-minded catch on to the things that do come through and are happy to accept them as proof. The problem is those who don’t, always want more proof – it’s never enough. If you watch the film “Ghost” you can see Patrick’s frustration with trying to prove he’s around Demi.

The problem is there’s never enough proof. If somebody wants birthdays and you bring through birthdays, then a person who was negative and turned off by this will quite correctly be able to say it could be a lucky guess or a trick. And that’s true, some people can do that. If it’s down to favourite colours and foods, it still comes down to a possible lucky guess, or maybe you’re priming the person for information. It’s a bit like the person who would be as ridiculous as saying there is no such thing as electricity coming through the power point, and you want to prove it by sticking their finger in the socket. They do, they die. There will never be enough proof until you die.

I’ve been asked some times whether the TV show “The Ghost Whisperer” is what it’s really like. I’m not saying to believe everything you see, particularly on TV. All I am saying is, you should be open-minded. I have a problem with a lot of TV shows and movies, who portray contact with the afterlife as something that it’s not. There are those who are gifted who do get very clear specific information with very the images. The other thing I find with a show like “The Ghost Whisperer” is that it wrongly shows she stops and listens to large volumes of information with complete sentences. It generally doesn’t happen like that, particularly for ordinary “non-psychic” people wanting to connect with family and friends for the first time.

For most people it’s a burst of information. So what might take two or three sentences to come through in normal conversation can take a split-second: as an image or a thought for a feeling. That’s why many spiritualists struggle at times to explain in words. That’s important for you as a normal, non-psychic person who may not be terribly psychic to realise this.

A momentary burst of an image, a feeling or a couple of words. It comes through quickly and it’s usually the first thing you think of when you ask for some information. I talk about this my book and on my CD and my other materials: So in my son’s case when he first got some information through from my mother, he didn’t get told he’s being shown a picture of the wattle tree with the yellow fluffy balls of wattle, with his dad (me) standing in front of it. He got a split-second image of a tree with cotton wool balls on in – and a bit later, saw the cotton-wool as yellow, and I was the one who had to piece together the fact that he was seeing the wattle tree I had a picture of, with me standing in front of it.

The information will be brief, and will be over very quickly, it isn’t really in full sentences. It’s often in feelings. I’m bringing this up because most people who watch a TV show like that will think it comes through like that and it doesn’t. It’s almost like three sentences could be encapsulated in one brief feeling that you would have trouble explaining fully in words, but you know what it means. And that’s what you’re looking for, when they contact you. It’s just this little rush of information which makes perfect sense to you even though it might be difficult for you to explain.

And this is also the reason some people miss the signs of contact, because you get a little burst of information and then you think it couldn’t possibly be right. Why would I have thought of that? But you did. And it’s real. Use the information in my video and on my website, CDs, book to help you understand that family in the Afterlife can contact you. You don’t have to be gullible, but just believe it. You don’t even have to believe it’s really happening. I just want you to believe that it’s possible. Because if you do that, then you’ll find things will start coming through. And my website explains how to verify it’s real. For information visit my website on spirit contact (philg.net.au or afterlifephilg.com)

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Spirit Contact: How Do You Find A Good Medium?

Tuesday, July 28th, 2009

I receive a large number of enquiries from people wanting to know of good, or genuine psychics, especially from the US and UK. I thought it about time I share my thoughts, to help those wanting to connect with loved ones who have passed away. I’m going to share my thoughts, but more importantly, I’m going to share how to use your own intuition to find the person you need!

Over the last few years I’ve done many readings but my real purpose, and the one I’m devoting my time to, is helping people make their own connection instead of doing readings. I firmly believe anyone can develop their own contact, and verify it, without the help of a medium or spiritualist. But I know some struggle initially to learn my simple technique, so in those cases, using someone else can be good, not only for answers, but to confirm your own fledgling contact with the Afterlife is real.

There are two problems here, as I see it: How do you find someone who is genuine, and then, how do you find one who’s good? I’m sure there are some genuine ones who work on the pay-per-minute basis, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable paying an Electrician on that basis. I’d want a quote, knowing what he estimated the job to be, and that’s the amount, and pay it. I don’t mind paying a good electrician more than the going rate if the work is good, but I still expect to know the amount. If he charged by the minute, how do I know how long the job will take? And how slow can he work? For those reasons, I personally don’t recommend pay-per-minute psychics or mediums.

There’s a big range of opinions: I have stumbled across many who have suggested good people to me, but surprisingly, I have also heard criticism of most of them from others. So, why is there such a difference? If you ask an electrician to do a job, you describe it, he quotes for it, and you get the job. It may not be 100% as you wanted, but it will be close. But what of an interior designer, like you see on a lot of TV shows lately? They come in, take over, tell you to ‘trust them’ and a few days later, you have the finished product. It may be fantastic. But it may also not be what you want, or expected. I’ve seen a few lately where the clients actually hated the finished result! Using a psychic is like that. You don’t really know what you’re getting because they’re all different.

Using the same ‘designer’ thought – you would either ask for contacts who have used them, or have spoken to someone you know who’s used them. That way, you can get an idea of what they’re like. Importantly, that still doesn’t address the issue of getting the unexpected, but it does give you a ‘vibe’ or ‘feel’ of what to expect. You will be closer to the mark.

If you GO INTO a spiritual or new age bookshop and you’re not used to it, it will be a weird experience, but hang in there. Tell them WHAT YOU WANT, what you expect. I find it’s very rare to find a shop that isn’t genuine. Misguided, weird, maybe, but I find most are genuinely trying to help. They will talk about psychics who may visit their store, or they know of. Now I want you to use your own intuition, your own, perhaps unknown spiritual contact with the Afterlife, to be guided in your decision.

BEFORE you walk in the store, think of the person you wish to make contact with. If you’re searching the internet or phone book, use the same technique. I just find the ‘guidance’ you need is clearer, more noticeable, if it’s in person. Ask the person you want to connect with, to be with you as you seek your psychic, even though you may not be able to feel them near, or talk to them (yet). Ask them if the person you’re being told about, or the person/shop you’re dealing with, FEELS right. You should immediately get a ‘gut feel’ of “Yes” or “No”. It may be faint, but you will IMMEDIATELY have a split second feeling of “Yes” or “No”. Without thinking any more about it, accept that as the answer. If it’s “Yes” – go ahead and book a session or follow up with the name you’ve been given (and then use the same method when you contact them to enquire about a booking). If “No” – don’t, and go somewhere else, telling them “I’ll think about it” and politely walk out the door.

The next problem is ‘what to expect’. Some mediums make vivid spirit contact, with strong images, feelings or words. Some hear very clear voices; others see sharp and detailed images. But it’s not like playing a guitar. With a musical instrument, you’re either good, or not good. With Afterlife contact, it varies from person to person, from the psychic, to your expectations, to the person ‘coming through’. Some spirits come through strongly, others ’stand back’ somewhat. I think the important thing is to accept what’s coming through, at least initially. I personally find if someone’s open to the process, even if I start off a bit ’shaky’, it’s gets clearer and better as we progress. Negative comments at the start are like taking a cold shower and tend to stop the whole process.

If at all possible, ask for clients who may be able to indicate what they think of the psychic – you don’t want to know if they’re “Good” or “Bad” – that’s open to opinion. What you want to know is HOW they share information. Are they ‘facts and figures’ or ‘emotions’ or ‘the future’ or whatever. From this TECHNIQUE, you’ll know if this is they type of experience you want or not.

Apart from the possibility you’re with a phoney (but if you use the technique I just described, that shouldn’t happen), my only two concerns about the way a clairvoyant or medium shares information are these: If negative, DISTRESSING information comes through, without being offered positively, giving the opportunity to change or improve or accept things (that is, without compassion) I think the person presenting the messages is uncaring. I believe any message, no matter how upsetting or terrible, can be presented with compassion.

My other concern is those who use lots of props and theatre. I know different psychics use various props to help them, but some use many different things to create the illusion of being genuine, and ‘gifted’. I have sat in a room of 100 psychics, all at desks, with virtually no props. These are people all with different abilities and methods, yet all worked with the minimum of accessories, and I was not aware of a single complaint all day. Those who are good, and genuine, I believe do not need elaborate props to connect, or impress.

So, approach the whole thing with an acute awareness of ‘gut feel’ from the loved one you want to contact. When you are having your session, remember it’s like working with a designer who may share things differently to what you expect. Don’t be too critical with wanting ‘proof’ – whilst you want it to show contact is real, if you are too cynical and too demanding, no amount of proof will be enough, and you will miss the messages. I say this with caring, but it’s true. If your session is 1 hour, and you spend 45 minutes wanting proof, where’s the time for the ‘messages’.

I’m known as “Afterlife Phil G” due to a quirk in the search engine world, so if my thoughts help you, you or your friends can find more information by searching that term on Goggle, or my web site on spirit contact. (philg.net.au or afterlifephilg.com). I accidentally discovered the psychic ability I believe exists in everyone, yet is ignored, disbelieved, or suppressed by so many. My goal is always to share how ordinary people can contact family and friends in the afterlife themselves.

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Phil G’s Simple Approach To Contacting The Afterlife

Friday, July 24th, 2009

Following the loss of her partner, Phil G is asked by a woman in Milwaukee, USA, how to re-start a connection to him, in the Afterlife. Initially getting ’signs’ that he’s around, she now feels it’s stopped. She also couldn’t be with him at the end, and wants to know if that’s okay.

Despite my belief in being able to contact family and friends in the afterlife, I know some think I’m crazy. But that doesn’t bother me, because I get so many messages from ordinary people who find my simple idea works, and they verify it themselves which is great, and cool! I’m glad this lady got signs to start with, but I strongly believe she’s still getting them, and missing the subtle clues. I also feel there are reasons why we sometimes happen to miss the final moments of someone’s life.

My father died a couple of years ago, and he desperately wanted to come home from hospital. I live a long way from his home, and there was no way we could provide care for him there. I know it’s sad when they want to ‘go home’ but sometimes, we can’t always do what we wish. I don’t believe they hold that against us, and understand.

I received an email today sharing a beautiful story. Originally, this person wrote of how distressed she was feeling. She purchase the audio “Contacting the Afterlife – a Spoken Beginners Guide” from the website (philg.net.au or afterlifephilg.com). And although she didn’t think she could do it, her email today was a very excited one indeed, as she not only connected, but verified it was real. She was very surprised, and overwhelmed with joy at knowing her partner is still with her, and she can verify it!

In this case, I don’t feel your partner has stopped contacting you. Sometimes, they may not appear to be around and there can be a few reasons, but in most cases, I think it’s because you WANT them too strongly – you miss the subtle signs. In my book and on the website, I talk about the gentle signs being like a gentle breeze, and it’s so easy to miss them, especially if you’re trying so hard.

Think back to what happened when you did get a sign, a feeling he was near. Although it may have been an outward sign, something IN YOUR HEAD made you think: “It’s Him”. It’s different. You just KNOW. You can’t really explain it to anyone else, and everyone else may think you’re silly, but in your heart, you know.

Embrace that feeling again. You probably want ’signs’ too much. Just think about him, feel that feeling in your head that he’s near, and trust him. He wants you to be strong for others, to hold and hug you and wipe your tears. Look at the simple ideas on my website, and believe the possibility that he’s still with you, and verify it later.

The website has quite a bit of free information, and a link to the YouTube video called “CoffeeTime” which allows you to create a situation conducive to contacting family in the afterlife. Just ENJOY them being with you, without necessarily wanting ‘a sign’ – and FEEL them in your head and heart, and don’t think you’re imagining it, but just savour the moment. Although you may want proof for others or yourself, just for now, if you’re having trouble getting a connection, I think you should NOT ask for a sign, or expect one, but get used to the different feeling in your head and heart when they’re around, and the rest will happen.

The key here for anyone who either wants to contact loved ones who have passed away, or feels they’ve had something already, but now feel the connection is lost, is to take it one step at a time, don’t try too hard, relax, and gradually let it happen, gradually understand the connection, and then go on to verify it using the ideas on my website.

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Afterlife Phil G’s Poem On Life After Death Comforts The Grieving

Friday, July 10th, 2009

Afterlife Phil G has made a beautiful poem available to share. The poem starts: “Don’t grieve my loss, I have not gone. I am the one who enters your dreams. Caresses your face. Hugs you. Misses you”.

If you know of someone who is grieving the loss of a loved one, like so many others you may like to print a copy of the full poem from Afterlife Phil G’s website on life after death.

An email to Phil asks: “My wife passed a few months ago. I cannot bring myself to remove everything of my wife’s. I want to keep everything as if she’s still here. My friends say I need to let go. What do you advise?”

For younger people, I believe there is a point to move on, and accept the loss of a loved one. To know they’re still around and contactable, and yet they are accepting of life going on, and are okay with you finding another partner as the years roll on.

For parents who have suffered the loss of a child, or for older people who have lost their partner, it can be of enormous comfort to leave a room untouched, and be able to walk into it and feel as if they are still in the room. This is not just a wish but a reality, and if you follow my advice, you will be able to feel them in the room and verify it.

On my website on life after death, I share a video that has helped many, called ‘CoffeeTime’, and whether it’s sitting in a room thats untouched, or holding a favourite coffee mug, it will help you feel the presence of a passed loved one.

The poem “Don’t Grieve – for I am still with you” popped into my head one night in 2007. It’s not even the kind of phrases I’d use, so I have to thank my friends in the Afterlife for being able to share with others this wonderfully helpful poem.

If you miss someone, I hope you will find comfort by visiting either of my websites philg.net.au or afterlifephilg.com and looking at my poem, video or other information. Don’t Grieve – theyre still with you. Phil G

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I Sense Him Near – But How Do I Get Clear Messages? Phil G On Life After Death

Thursday, July 9th, 2009

Afterlife Phil G shares his mailbag to recognize contact from life after death: “I lost my father, I sense him near, but my thoughts are so mixed up I can’t actually ‘connect’ with him…” writes Lisa from the UK.

“In answer, can I say that belief in being able to connect with the afterlife doesn’t always translate to being able to connect clearly, especially if it’s someone very close to you – the problem is how to verify it when you already know so much.”

I had the same problem (visitors to my website on contacting the afterlife will know my discovery was accidental, back in 2002) and it’s why I developed my simple technique. Firstly, if you sense him around, then he’s there. I know some would think that’s a nave statement, but it’s true and you can verify it yourself in time.

We need to move onto how to clarify things. Specifically there are a few tools I make available to help on my website on contacting the afterlife. Can I run through those first. Connecting is about being relaxed, to the point you’re not controlling your own thoughts – like a deep meditation phase where your body goes to jelly – accepting anything that comes through, and then verifying it, step by step, until it becomes easier.

On my web site on life after death, I share many tools to help, most of them free, including instructions, a YouTube video, and a list of books and things to help. But the starting point is to be relaxed. I find it hard to get clear information or feelings if I am busy, rushed, or thinking about everything else, so the first step is to be really relaxed, to the point of not thinking about anything else. Any meditation will do, including my “Contact Family in the Afterlife yourself” audio guide.

From my own personal perspective, I find it hard to get clear information or feelings if I am too much in the “now” – so the absolute important step is to relax. Especially if you ‘feel’ people around – it’s often much easier to know when others are around rather than those who you know well. Relaxing helps you ‘zone out’ and any meditation will do or the “Contact Family in the Afterlife yourself” audio guide has a very effective section in it.

The reason you need to relax and let go is so that any random thought can come in. When you are aware of things, and your mind is switched on, you think things through too much, you analyse too much, and that stops the flow of information. It’s like asking someone’s advice, and then thinking your own thoughts and not listening – you won’t hear them, you’ll only hear your own thoughts. You may not get what you want right now, but you’ll get things, and it gets easier.

Lastly, you want to confirm what you got was not just your own thoughts, and my personal suggestion is to ask for something you don’t know, or something you’re forgotten. Something you don’t know can be any random thing. In my wife’s case, the final ‘proof’ she needed to verify I was sharing messages from her father was an image I saw of a round cylinder containing a bunch of pens and pencils, being knocked to the ground. I had not seen her office, did not know she had pens and pencils in a container like that (she doesn’t at home), and she had in fact knocked it off the desk that day.

In my book ‘Soul Matters – you can talk with those you miss’ I talk about my Nanna coming through one evening. (She passed away when I was about 7) She showed me a scone on a plate. I had no idea what this meant, until I heard her voice say “don’t you remember the scones?” – then I remembered. I had asked my mum over and over to make scones like my Nanna (The British make scones much better than Aussies do!) I had completely forgotten that.

So ask those two questions, and trust whatever is brought through will make sense, and verify your connection. You see, it’s not so much as you need to know HOW to connect, but how to clarify what you’re getting, and although the steps I’ve listed do both, in your case, concentrate on those little differences between just ‘feeling he’s near’ and ‘asking for verification’.

I hope this works for you. Tell me how you get on in a few months by using the feedback link on the website (philg.net.au). I’m sure you’ll get the clarity and proof you desire.

Phil G

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Life After Death – A Poem To Comfort The Grieving From ‘Afterlife Phil G’

Monday, July 6th, 2009

Afterlife Phil G has made a beautiful poem available to share. The poem starts: “Don’t grieve my loss, I have not gone. I am the one who enters your dreams. Caresses your face. Hugs you. Misses you”.

Available in full on ‘Afterlife Phil G’s’ website on life after death, many have used the poem at funerals, or framed it to hang on a wall.

“I was recently asked by Joe, in Australia, how to help a friend accept the loss of his wife. He asks: “Everything has been kept the same as if she was still living in the house. Is this wrong?”

Whilst I believe firmly that it is possible, and right, to retain contact with someone in the afterlife, I feel younger persons also need to be able to move on with their life, and allow others to come in.

For parents who have suffered the loss of a child, or for older people who have lost their partner, it can be of enormous comfort to leave a room untouched, and be able to walk into it and feel as if they are still in the room. This is not just a wish but a reality, and if you follow my advice, you will be able to feel them in the room and verify it.

“I know of many who use my poem on contacting the afterlife in combination with using a room, or objects left behind by those we love and miss. My ‘CoffeeTime’ video found on my website on life after death shares how to feel them around you, and verify it.

The poem “Don’t Grieve – for I am still with you” popped into my head one night in 2007. It’s not even the kind of phrases I’d use, so I have to thank my friends in the Afterlife for being able to share with others this wonderfully helpful poem.

If you miss someone, I hope you will find comfort by visiting either of my websites philg.net.au or afterlifephilg.com and looking at my poem, video or other information. Don’t Grieve – theyre still with you. Phil G

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